May 10, 2018
All Names have been removed and The Company to protect the identities of this person. I will add the company name on Later.We will be following her story and updating as we learn more .
Her Story :
I am a woman in her mid life who has never suffered severe anxiety and depression. I have always been healthy loving life and a go getter. very accomplished in life job and home life. happy married have kids a loving husband who also was retired Military Soldier . More or less i could not have had a better life. More recently I had been relatively well but feel myself slipping very fast into depression and loneliness wishing I don't wake up again. . Why ? Because i am being isolated due to an injury which happened and then filing a complaint against my supervisor and my peers. Who in turn completely isolated me away from the rest. I mean completely in the sense of isolation . No one for hours at a time due to what is happening at work.Unless someone comes up to where I am or comes to see me , someone I knew before, I see no one. In a dark overly hot no air circulation area. I come home most nights emotionally drained and sometimes in tears. I am also having trouble sleeping sick to my stomach wake up throwing up and headaches and have reoccurring nightmares of being locked in a closed room and not being able to get out. I work for a large organization that has a terrible culture, high accident rate, and where I have seen people being treated poorly, allot of discrimination between age and younger peers. Those with college educations treated badly and passed over. Safety is screamed from the ladder , but no one is listening, nor is anyone caring. 3 minute classes on Power tools. 3 minutes crash learning how to use a fork lift or walkie. No wonder so many are getting hurt or hitting walls ,not to mention an elevator thats been repaired many times. The main elevator has so many issues. Getting stuck running hot so you smell it ,and the electrical to breaking down ,with people in it to dropping a foot or so when it is moving. banging even into the walls. The younger ,just out of high school promoted with no knowledge over those who do know . This company is being run into the ground as they are not willing to listen to those who know what they are doing over those who have no idea and no background. All in all allot of strife and issues. It is also rife with cliques. This organization wants to control as much that comes out hide the truth and continue to lie as much about what is going on inside for the sake of its investors. We hear one thing from their corporate yet ask our selves is this really the company we work for because everything they are saying is half the the truth. I understand sometimes you cant say some things but this seems to be two different companies. as it seems to run but nothing really is working . They say one thing to investors yet we know it is a lie. Most of us just don't say anything for fear of retaliation . They threaten us with papers we signed not to talk to others or we will be sued but when is enough?So much waste yet they between tax payers money and the kick backs and the cult that seems to follow it it seems to be staying well i should say hanging on by a thread, Allot of discrimination injuries and racily profiling accusations over this company . I am willing to lay my life on the fact many of these lawsuits and accusations about the stuff going on that hits the news is 98 % correct. The news has stories now and then and you see it quickly disappear from the news because it was a fast pay off or intimidation of fear and destroying the individual who dared to bring the issue to light. We are always told we can talk to anyone or email the higher people. However that is far from the truth they work to keep us quiet and not to say a word. This company is a range of quagmires within itself. . Which is sad because so much is true about what is being said but so many inside lawyers to fight it off that nothing is done about it . The better words are it is swept under a carpet . There has been a recent restructure and or hiring in the area i was , there have been changes and soon I will find myself in a small team of 3 plus one other person who works closely with our area and who is considered as unofficially the fourth member of the team. That fourth member is another co worker who ended up being isolated as well . Both of us have well rounded back grounds and accomplished. We are out spoken and work well with others our back grounds show this . But it seems when we push back for equality or for rights of our self or others we were punished and bullied and in retrospect isolated. I have been isolated since December 2017. My story starts in 2017 when i was hired . A young man about half my age younger then me maybe just out of highschool who turned out later on to be my supervisors boss. interviewed me and frankly never even read my profile nor my resume . he saw a middle age something year old lady quiet in disposition . Doing the interview he asked me questions that had nothing to do with the job and borderlines on would i do anything asked of me to make the company
This Is The Letter Written By Her Kid which went ignored by The Company
My mother works for Company , Your Factory , My mother, the world, the incredible, the mother who was born and thrown away at the age of 2 at an orphanage door step. My mother who grew up helping those who needed help , sacrificing the dreams and things she wanted for others . Working overseas in war zones and coming back to raise me and my brother and sister all the while while working as a civil servant not asking for anything in return. Barely making ends meet ,but knowing love was what made us a family. From those who had been injured to looking for those who were lost. Red Cross and all she gave it her all . My mother was active loved to hike, run ,mountain climb, bike, and camping ,anything that had to do with nature ,away from the smog and cities that would drag anything down and dirty the soul. She always looked out into the stars wondering what was waiting to be found. How she could make a better world. When we moved to NV she wanted to work with Company a company which gave humanity a new beginning and a way to make it cleaner and safer. She saw what she had always seen a way to help. It’s too bad no one else saw that in her. They saw a number & a warm body. But now My mother is slowly dying inside. She got injured at Company. She didn't stop working she felt it was a duty to herself to keep working because she had a family to support and so many depended on her. No one else was going to pay the bills. If she works she can’t heal and if she doesn't work her family ends up homeless. and now that is where we are gong because you are pushing her out. They really didn't make it any easier in fact the work load just kept coming. No one believed she was injured until she brought in the papers and pictures from doctors Evan though many had seen what happened. They saw her pain and turned a blind eye. To them it was an inconvenience. It didn't stop if she was injured and the more she said something the more they treated her with disrespect. As if they could push her away. I call it bulling and it shouldn’t been allowed. Her age or her weight . My mom did not complain but others told us. So sad indeed. But in the end you pushed her away . Shame on you . So now the journey begins. Anticipatory grief they call it. Sometimes, I think it’s just watching your loved one in pain, vanish, slowly saying goodbye to things that will never come back. She does know the prognosis, so we’re just waiting. We’re waiting for the slow process , for the moment when we can’t talk to her anymore because she isolates herself from the pain and suffering she feels and the depression .. Or she doesn’t have any good times left because it was robbed from her. The hell of watching someone suffer isn’t just the actual suffering part. It’s the months, weeks and days leading up to it. It’s the pain of watching day by day the most important person in your life slip further and further away from you while there is nothing you can do to stop it. You don’t lose this person in one moment. You lose them gradually throughout the whole time they are really there . As time goes on, they become less and less the person that they were before they were injured.I miss my mom i miss who she was the person who needs to heal. I don’t know how to find even slightly pleasant words to describe what watching a parent suffering pain feels like. It’s absolutely terrifying. Its gut wrenching. It sends you through a whirlwind of feelings and. Emotions you don't even know who you are anymore it takes over your life. . It all feels so fragile, like watching a butterfly land in your hand, knowing any moment now, it will fly away. Just for that one moment though, you watch it, breathlessly, and in awe of its beauty. That is who my mother was to those who knew her., but not many there took the time to know who she really was . Funny how beauty isn’t truly appreciated until it can be taken away from you. It infuriates me that she got injured after so much she has done for this world. Today like many other nights I heard my mother crying . The unimaginable sadness of having to let go of life itself the things she longs to do but no longer able to do. . I was holding her warm hand, as if her body was trying to put the warmth of the life she’s going to miss into what time is left. I see her pain, and it kills me that she has to do this alone because no one gave a damn. I see the discomfort, the frustration, and her incredible ability to get up and try again day after day. I feel so much guilt for her feeling so much responsibility to take care of us. She tells me she’s fine so that I’ll relax, but I know she’s just protecting me I wouldn't wish the pain on my worst enemy. She cries for us, her kids. It is not only our loss, it’s also her loss. The things she wanted to leave behind and dreams she had. And that is incredibly difficult to wrap your mind around it the pain of watching day by day the most important person
in your life slip further and further away from you while there is nothing you can do to stop it. She will no longer be able to do what she did before but bah who cares right? She told me today to start writing them down. That is when I also wanted you to know just how much it took from my mom. How unfair it is to have done this to my mother. But in your life one person who is not a celebrity and just one person who is a no one doesn't really matter does it? What if it was your mom?? Is it easy to pretend they are just numbers and just as easy to walk away pretending life is great, How hard some worked and how devoted they were ? But to me my mom meant the most to us and to those she helped in life . Who she is and how much she has to offer the world. She didn’t blame anyone yet she could have. She is telling me to let go of controlling, to give in with what is, to respect people where they are, to choose the life that makes me the happiest. To be my most authentic self, to be patient, to enjoy life, But how do you do that when you watch the one who gave you life suffer the most? By now, I havent slept more than a few hours a night since she got injured because of her pain and knowing she will have pain for the rest of her life. That she will no longer do what she loved in this world. Where she will have to let go of her dreams and live with being robbed of her life as it was before she worked for you. I feel like I’m stuck in a movie. I feel like I get to walk into a life that doesn’t exists anymore. It’s as if I can crawl into the TV showing old family videos and walk around in a life that has been. My life, as I know it, is slipping away like sand between my hands. I pray angels will descend towards earth to come and pick her up. Her crying out in pain at night crying in her sleep as her back and leg continue to hurt so bad. Moments like these demand prayer. So here it goes. I dare pray to spare us. I pray for a miracle. I naively continue to believe in recovery and I’ll continue that prayer until the day she dies. I can’t believe my moments with her are numbered as sand in an hourglass . I refuse to truly embody how rare the present moment is, how rare my moments are with her. I, the girl of words, can’t find them when I’m around her.
I pray to help me let go of my anger, towards everybody and everything that is happening. I ask you to help me let go of my guilt, because at some level, I think she needed to blame those who were responsible. I ask for all the guardian angels to support us through this. I ask for them to embrace my family in their wings, and protect us through every step. I ask you to help me remember my mother, and my mother’s energy to run walk skip hop and do the things she loved like climbing mountains , I ask you to let me be just like my mother someone who brought joy love care and most of all help when one needed it most. For when I myself have children and must keep her legacy alive. But foremost, I pray for light and love through what will be one of the purest moments of our lives, including hers.
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